Thursday, February 5, 2015

Does Size Matter?

I read an article recently entitled “10 Reasons to Never Date a Man with a Big Penis [here].

While, I did get a bit of a giggle about some of the reasons mentioned, I thought I would take the opportunity to give my own point of view (having lived with a man with a bigger than average appendage for quite a few years)

1. Normal Condoms Don’t Fit.
This is very true.  It’s not often you can go into a shop and just pick up a packet of XXXL condoms and apparently, trying to get a smaller size to fit, has all kinds of problems, the worst of which is that it cuts off the blood flow, meaning you’re not going to be needing that condom any time soon anyway.
Would anyone ask for size small?
2. Vagina’s Don’t Fit
Trust me, if a baby’s head, the size of a bowling ball, can squeeze out of your lady parts, a penis is not going to give you any problems at all, no matter what size it is.  Obviously, if it’s about a foot and a half long, it might hit the top of your cervix (or your throat) but a little wiggle one way or another and you can find a comfortable position.  If not, then your partner should not drill so deep, after all, its not all about him is it?

3. Cystitis (UTI)
Okay, yeah, this is a real thing.  But, I don’t think the size really has that much to do with it.  I think it’s the position actually.  In my experience, I’ve found that too much sex doggy style while laying flat on my stomach with a penis hammering away at my urethra over and over… and over and over…. Will result in a UTI.   But it feels so good at the time……..
Lots of Cranberry juice ladies
4. Anal
Well, okay I agree, a thicker penis is a problem here.  And it’s not as if we haven’t tried (quite a few times actually).  It’s really quite like putting a square peg in a round hole.  Bad analogy, but trust me, it just ain’t easy!  Not that it’s never happened and that it won't be attempted again but you've just got to be very relaxed.

5. A Very Real Risk of Suffocation
Unless you are Linda Lovelace, there’s probably a really good chance that you can actually die of suffocation by penis. Not something that I would want to do. And it doesn’t look particularly sexy when you’re drooling spit down your chin (which always seems to happen), trying to breathe through your nose and then you kind of throw up a bit and it comes out your nostrils.  Eeww.  Yeah, not sexy, not sexy at all.

6. Vanilla Sex
I have been with my over-endowed man for quite a few years now, and trust me, there’s no vanilla sex going on in our bedroom.  You name a position and we’ve probably tried it, liked it, and done it again.

7. Bleeding
Pork swords can be a real thing.  In my sex life, however, it’s never happened. But then, some women bleed with any size penis.  If having sex is making you bleed, you probably should see a doctor, or at least ask your swordsman to take the razor blades off the end of his dick.

8. Careful, Measured Sex
Nope.  Just nope.  Sex is sex and if you want to get it on, there’s no point in being careful or measured.  Just Do It (as they say).

9. You Will Always Need Lube
Lube…. Well yes, lube is nice.  But if you’re in the right mood, generally you make your own lube. Need a quickie, then there are other things to create lube. But then again, the slickery, silky feel of lube is a turn on itself.  So I’m not complaining.

10. They’re Messy to Look At
I don’t think this is a size thing – they’re all ugly.  Sorry chaps, but that’s just how it is.  A penis is never going to win a beauty contest, is it?  But it’s not what it looks like, it’s how you use it!

I think the person who wrote that article has just got herself a new man who has a whopper of a wiener and she's just a little bit scared.  But trust me, dear, once you've ridden it a while, you will never, ever want to go back to a Mr. Average Dick.

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